It was about this woman I knew. I had a fling with her I guess. Her real name is Donna. She was 10 years older then me at the time. She was butchy I guess.
In this dream we were laying around on this couch. She looked over to me and said, "I wonder how you and your ex Meg, would be if you both got back together."
"Only because you both have changed so much!" She added.
I woke up and thought about what she said....
If Meg and I got back together....
So I done something about it. I texted my ex about the dream and asked what she thought.
she said, "sign...teary"
She then texted, "Of course I think about it all the time."
Him or Her---
The passion for life is of little degrees, packed in crates of junk,
Chained inside the reality of everything in the ocean -that sunk.
We talk little of what is true and what seems to matter, as love has it,
I feel the pain and the pinching feeling from deep in my dark pit.
A song plays in the background and music isn't heard,
Tears of memories only exist- sounds of nature has only occurred.
Endless and unforgiving I call the number of someone far,
I plan to travel into the past and I plan to travel in my car.
Beached, drained and gutted, I hang upside down to the world,
I wear lipstick and dress nice with my hair all fancy and curled.
A place only from the past can have me so girly for all to see,
Yes, it is Mamie- the one you captured, who is now free.
You threw me over the edge and never once guided my fall,
You nipped and tug at my feelings even when I would call.
You tore my heart into little pieces and made me pick them up alone,
You made me beg for your love even when my flesh turned into bone.
Alcohol had been your source of pleasure while I watched and waited,
I learned to expect the worst from you and for everything- I hate it.
So we are at 3 beers now but what about the 6th beer on the way,
By the 8th beer, you'll be cursing me out and telling me to not stay.
When the name-calling is done, why don't you console your crying fem?
Throw punches, throw furniture and hit me like I am an object as them.
Cry and curse me to have cancer and wish me to hang myself at night,
Look at me with hate and crush me under your sight.
What did I lack in your life, I don’t smoke, do drugs or drink beer,
I took care of you and loved you but you still couldn't stand me near.
I would have done everything for you and stayed by your side,
Even after you cheated, got sneaky and after you lied.
The two very things that took my life and snared me into a trap,
Enormous little things that hold me tight onto their boneless lap.
Immeasurable to the naked eye, you need to see me under a microscope,
Pray for me to see the end and to escape with some clothes and little hope.
Dream and pretend it is over and wish someday God would finally arrive,
I will then scream to the Lord, "why is it, I come this far to survive?"
The memories alone are of little comfort into my past of many things,
I wait and welcome whatever life has to give and whatever it brings.
A visionary of sort, I dabble with my oppressive nature to living,
In hopes one day, I will be wrong and somehow God can be forgiving.
My willingness to see eye to eye, I witness a person blocking my sight,
The awkwardness to shift gears was like driving straight into blinding light.
From the bottom of the dark pit, I am seen feeble to the arms of a giant,
I crumble and shake under its shade, and start to become defiant.
But nothing can prepare me for what I was about to endure,
Something that is life shattering and life threatening, I am sure.
Worthless and distressed, I lay weeping into the hands of this man,
Something not apart of life’s design and something not apart of my plan.
Weak and disabled, I fall into the arms of him and give him my body and soul,
I watched him bit by bit, shovel back the dirt into my once 6 feet hole.
Now only a heap of mud is left and falling into its pit is now wavering,
For he fills my every need to a mouth-watering desert that’s worth savoring.
Lifted from the ground, I live inside the clouds of his castle far away,
Blessed to have him, I thank God for letting me see on that very day.
Smoothly he handles my memories of the past and carries my sorrow,
Just by insuring me a better day into the future by taking me into tomorrow.
Written by Me
So, my ex Meg has 11 peacebonds against her. I know she has anger issues and I know she gets jealous if a man pays attention to me.....but has she really changed? After 7 years of relationship with her and taking her crap----5 years apart.....has she changed...
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